Being a Loser, Part 1

So, what does it take to be a loser?
1. You gotta be corny, buddy.
2. You have to have a style which is unappreciated and out of fashion
3. Have tons of people call you loser. Behave like a sissy when they do.
4. Use words like "omg" or "weiner" or "scaredy cat."
5. Get a blog. Talk about corny stuff.
6. Go stuff your face in a pie.
7. Get a few bullies on your back.
8. Ask the old moldy librarian out.
9. Fall in love with cheese. Carry it around.
10. Wear a shirt that says, "MONKEY PRIDE!"
11. Carry out a beanie baby.
12. Call people with pink sweaters pirates

*Loser! does not encourage you to follow this list, and all lawsuits will be filed back!! suckers!!